Holy Cow!

Holy Cow It's been awhile since I update this. Every once in awhile I would love to blog here though no one I know read this anymore and this cannot be public anymore haha. Do anyone still remember that our blog exist? Probably not. Boy oh boy, am I glad this semester is over or what. It has been a week into my break and I am somewhat sad as people are leaving after this week. This year, not only did I get to reconnect with some people like Aimee, but also I gained new friends that I thought I would've never gained such as Edmund. Yeah. It might seem strange to people that Edmund and I are getting close. Don't ask me how or why it happens. I guess it just happens. Anyhow I am glad. Next Aimee. I am seriously glad that we get to reconnect after all those bs that was thrown at us. I love how we get to talk and interact and text message and skype with each other. =]. Most importantly, I can reach you whenever I want to. Another person that I am glad that I make a connection with or I guess I hang out alot more during this break would be Jimbo. We never hang out as much until this year, where I felt like we hung out alot even though sometimes are hang out times are short or merely just 30 mins. Nonetheless I am glad to have you people. So a day or two ago, I went to livermore to shop with this super duper great friend of mine. The atmosphere at livermore was so different compare to the malls that I've been to. I think it is because it is a open mall type kind of thing. Whereas all the mall I've been to are closed roof mall. Anyhow, its another outlet mall and nothing spectacular. Hmm so the store we spent the most time in was Levi's. I got my jeans in like less than a min or so. My friend had to try his jeans on so he did................ WHile I was waiting for him, outside of the fitting room, this trigger my mind to think of something way back in the past. October 8th 2007 was a really old time to even remember. However that was the first time I actually did like a real actual shopping with my best guy friend then. Man.. that time was one of the time that I really enjoyed and it was a long time since I was able to shop like that. Hmm I remember he wanted me to try on some dress shirt and some jackets, but I was so embarrassed or something and I was taking kind of long. He actually went into my fitting space and helped me put on the clothes. I remember this like it was still in the back of my head. My eyes were looking side ways like I was really embarrassed or something. This was so much fun... The only complaint I had was that I wished it was a girl with me trying on clothes instead of him! Anyhow I zoned back into reality and that was the end of my night.

Unexpectedly

Life is always throwing you curve ball whether you like it or not. People would've never imagine where they will be within a year or so. 2012 as of now has been one hell of a ride for me since the beginning of this year like march through april. What can I say. It seems like I am getting closer to graduate. Everybody is graduating this year too. I believe. If not everybody then most of us will. They are all mostly worry about finding a job. Me on the other hand is happy to get the fuck out of school and just take up whatever job I can find. Probably working as a stripper is my #1 choice. Actually looking back, I think I am bless to have what I have in life. Not necessarily the things that I want but you can't always get what you want and I am fine with that. The last two years, I have been to the most wrestling event I ever been to and I am thankful for that. I never imagined that I could go at least 3 times a year to these wrestling event. Maybe because I know how to drive now. I remember the first and only time I went was back in high school freshman year. Anyway now that I've been to other, not just some weakass one but Summerslam is a big deal. I am glad. To be able to live as long as I have and see the birth of Final Fantasy 4 all the way till final fantasy 14 and more is also a bless. Man if God makes me walk away tmr from life I have no problem doing so. It's been a year since Xiao came back. I am glad it is back like the old times again. Having her presence here in San Francisco is just one of the best. Actually I would love to have everyone back here in San Francisco even though we all do our own thing sometimes. I am glad that I am able to spend time with the people that I really love and the people that I can call friends this summer. Xiao Jimmy and Aimee and of course the others too but these 3 are always MIA to school or something. People that I always love Amy, Aimee, Xiao,George, Kevin, Jimmy, Yong, and Ronald (no specific order). Thanks for always being there guys.

How many day has it been?

Seems like its been a long time since April. I am glad that this is finally over. I know we are not the right one for each other. Isn't it funny when you thought someone will understand you especially since we're on the same boat? I didn't think so. I wish we would never end up the way we did. I wish we are on speaking terms at least but what good does it do now? I don't even know if I can accept you even as a friend. I don't know how my mind would react to it. Until then, its over.

Day 1

Today is the first day I am making a blog dedicated to you APP.
Who read blogs nowadays? At least not my blog. SO this blog will be my escape.

This is the first day I am blogging about you APP. I miss you so bad but I don't know how to tell you I miss you after all those that happen. You probably moved on already and I am still stuck dwelling about you. I am foolish to be dwelling about you right?
The things you did makes me mad sometime but i try to keep it in so you wouldn't notice. I didn't want to mess things up but I guess i just can't take it anymore. Maybe it was a mistake for me to send you a freaking goodbye email but I feel like it is better for the both of us. OR at least you. I didn't really want to send you that email. Do you think that it was really easy for me to just walk away from everything that we had? Even though it was short, I just wish things didn't went down the way it did. I blame myself for having no confidence in you. I hate the fact how I feel like you will leave me the second time. I know you said you won't leave me anymore but somehow I just didn't take it.

I honestly fall for you at a pace that I never thought I would. As much as I would love to get to know you, i fell for you already. I mean if I didn't have anything for you I wouldn't have done the things I did. I read on your Facebook that you wish you can have someone to argue with and then get mad at you and then hug you out of nowhere and say I'm sorry. I really wished that I could be that person. But how can I try to be that person when you suddenly take that chance away from me. The way how you treated me, I can tell whats up but that doesn't mean I wanted to give up. I just really miss you. I want to wait for you at a place and when you arrive jump out and hug you and say I am sorry. I would do anything just to have you again.

I know I sent you the email already and there is nothing I can do to take it back. I wish that email somehow meant something to you because I haven't gotten a respond from you at all yet. I am so fluster at these kind of things to be honest. I may tell you one thing but deep down inside I want another. Just like how I told you that you didn't have to respond but deep down inside I really wanted you to respond. I really do hope that you can somehow read this but I doubt that you can because you don't even know that I have a blog.

I miss you so much to the point you are driving me crazy just thinking of you. Nothing I can do to keep myself to stop thinking about you. Sorry...

Making the impossible the possible

What is impossible? is there anything that is impossible? Is everything possible? Things seems so far and unreachable especially since the wave is pushing against you. I've been thinking that I might be wasting my time in school. True that a degree is required in order to survive in this world now, however what we learn in school will not be applicable in real world life situation.

Anyway that wasn't the point of this blog entry, that was just a little vent. My main point about defining my dream and figuring out what I really want in life. Well, not really figuring out what I want, but just complete what I wanted ever since I was little. I want to become a wrestler. However being what and who I am might make a little harder. However I will try and fight the impossible and make it possible. Whether it takes me 10-20 years to go on top, or not I will become a what I want, and I hopefully this will stay after I graduate and it won't be too late.

This is what I see when I see myself in the mirror. The next and the first Chinese American world heavy weight champion.

Sky Full Of Lighter

I am totally in love with this song. I just don't know why it is so soothing!
No one uses blog anymore and i don't know how to make my blog pretty pretty like the others.

Anyway someone is leaving or technically left, and I miss that person so much. She seem so close yet so far away to me. Without her presence i feel all alone in the dark. She is the light that brings me that bright smile. With out her positive energy evil will surely come haunt me! No No No No No! Why must you go away when we are starting to get close to each other.

I don't like seeing you the way you get treated and you being emo every other day. What are you fighting for. What is so good about this douche bag that you think its worth it for you to walk a mile for and ruin what you have with other? Perhaps you don't even know yourself. As an outsider maybe you are blinded by something that I cannot see. Maybe you think its worth it but in reality I think what you need is really a wake up call about what is going on. True that everytime when someone hits it hard you probably don't want to talk about it because you know its the truth however, you need someone who can give you the insight from outside, not someone who will always agree with you and give you some bs that YOU want to hear.

The sky is blue

The sky is particular blue tonight.
Somehow the stars are shining bright.
As the stars are shining bright down on me,
it catches my attention. I raised my head up only to
finally realize how blue the sky is. Was it the reflection of the moon?
Why is it so blue?
Reflection of the water? I don't think so.


Either way a character died in prison break and it was really sad.